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Jan. 5th, 2020

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Photograph by Tina Modotti, May Day 1929

Master List of Fic

General disclaimer: All the works listed here are transformative fiction, created for fun and pleasure. No copyright infringement is intended.

Iron ManCollapse )

Hawaii Five-0Collapse )

You can find all the fics above at my AO3 page: [archiveofourown.org profile] Eumelia

Crossposts: http://eumelia.dreamwidth.org/568286.html

Untitled

Yom Ha’Shoah is an Israeli holiday Diaspora Jews have adopted, for obvious reasons.

It is commemorated on the 27th of Nisan, to be adjacent to the Hebrew date of the Warsaw Ghetto uprising, which occurred on April 19th to May 16th, 1943.

It was also made to be adjacent to the Israeli Independence Day, the anniversary of the creation of the State.

This is no coincidence.

I would love nothing more than for this day to be a day of reflection and memorial of the victims and survivors of the Shoah, wherein entire branches of my family tree were decimated. My grandfather had run away from Europe long before the war and he died decades before I ever met him. I will never know who the members of my family. Even if members of my grandfather’s family and community survived, their names have been lost.

But it isn’t a day of reflection and memory.

Tonight Prime Minister Netanyahu said that the Iran nuclear deal was proof the world had not learned its lessons from the Holocaust. This, whilst refugees from Sudan and Eritrea rot in a prison camp and are forcibly deported to Rwanda. This, whilst there is a displaced Palestinian population under siege in our back yard.

Tomorrow an air-raid siren will sound to remind us to stand still in a moment of silence for 6 million members of family.

An air-raid siren.

I know, I know, why can’t I just let this day be about the memory of Jews who were murdered by the Nazis and the survivors who heroically made it out alive.

The above is how that memory is desecrated. If you’re going to commemorate an Israeli holiday, know its cost.

יזכור.

Tumblr crosspost: http://stillnotanonymous.tumblr.com/post/116486214091/yom-hashoah-is-an-israeli-holiday-diaspora-jews

Crossposts: http://eumelia.dreamwidth.org/603364.html

I am thinking of Passover...

I am thinking of Passover. What it means to be passed over. I don’t want to go biblical or theological, because that isn’t what matters to me. That isn’t what I want to talk about.

I will not be talking politics at the Seder tonight, I will be passing over the opportunity to make this Holiday about the present and the future, and our collusion with the persecution of the Strangers among us, as opposed to trudging our history of persecution and being Strangers in strange lands.

I will not be talking social justice at the Seder tonight. America loves its oranges and olives on the Seder plate, but I am the orange on the Seder plate, my life is passed over for I am single and have a cat for company; we are surrounded by olive groves, pulled out and burnt by those who are supposed to be members of my tribe, but who are so far removed from me and my sense of humanity I can barely consider them members of my species.

I will not be inserting any speech or letter at the Seder tonight, it will be straight forward and on until morning, I will eat the bitter herbs and sip the salty water and drink the sweet wine, keeping my mouth occupied, occupied against talking about the fact that we are not free.

I am not at liberty to speak.

Cross-post: Tumblr

Crossposts: http://eumelia.dreamwidth.org/603123.html

Happy Pesach

Holy Crap, I haven't written here since October.

That's a really long time for me and I hope most of you follow me on other social media or something? I hope I follow most of you. I'm mainly on twitter (@the_eumelia) these days, tumblr is a hell hole of despair.

Long form writing for me has gone by the wayside in a big way, I have much less time to meander on the text, I am really good at condensing my thoughts into 140 characters, who knew, what with the way I ramble on off line and here as well, historically.

Too many commas.

The thing is I always have DW and LJ tabs open on my browser. I feel secure in the knowledge that I still have these spaces that mean so much to me, that I hold so much of my history.

I'm an entirely different person now than I was ten years ago when I first opened an LJ. I was 20. Twenty fucking years old. I'm turning 30 in May. Thirty years. I'm so much less of an adult that I thought I was when I was 20 and fresh out of the IDF.

Thinking about what I've been through and actually done and accomplished over the past decade is actually extraordinary now that I think about it. But I'm looking forward to the next decade a whole lot more.

I'm financially independent, I'm living alone, I've recently adopted a cat (he is a beautiful tuxedo short hair who needed a home and whom, at 7 years, would have had a hard time of it) and I feel like I'm finally living the way I want.

A single, queer, crazy cat lady.

There's liberty in that and that's my message for this Passover.

I hope to write more here in the first year of my 30s.

Bless you friends and readers.

Crossposts: http://eumelia.dreamwidth.org/602818.html
Title: The World Is Turning to Noise
Author: [personal profile] eumelia/eumelia/[archiveofourown.org profile] Eumelia
Pairing/Characters: Steve/Danny
Rating: R/Mature
Spoilers: Episode 5.04 “Ka Noeʻau” (The Painter)
Word Count 1840
Warnings: Graphic description of decaying body
Disclaimer: This is a work of transformative fiction, created for fun and pleasure. No copyright infringement is intended.
Author's Notes: The title comes from Peter Gabriel's superbly haunting song “Signal to Noise”. This work was graciously beta'd by verasteine. Thank you, bb.
Summary: Steve puts a hand on his shoulder, squeezing before moving it up to cup Danny's jaw and face. “Don't look.”
--
Danny"s breaths are loud, shallow, his shoulders shaking with each inhale.Collapse )

Tumblr crosspost

Crossposts: http://eumelia.dreamwidth.org/602179.html

Things are coming to a head...

... and there's still so much to do!

Yesterday my mother and I went to Ikea and it wasn't as bad as I initially thought it would be. As some of you know, my mother and I tend to, uh, butt heads at times, but this was smooth sailing and we while we didn't whole heartedly agree on everything, we got what I wanted, seeing as it's my furniture.

The place is big and I'll most likely get a flatmate once I've settled in and made myself at home. But I do need some alone time. I'm just glad to finally get out of here after two years of living back at home.

It took a long time to get here and I probably should have gotten off my tuches and moved long ago, but inertia and uncertainty and anxiety stop me from doing many things when it comes to improving my quality of life.

Not to mention my laziness. I'm so very lazy, it's not even funny.

I'll be honest, I'm glad I'll be in my own place before I'm 30. I know it's an artificial milestone, but for fuck's sake, I'm going to be 30 in 2015 and it's not that far away; time is flying.

Meanwhile I need to start properly planning for my vacation, get the Internet hooked up in the flat so I don't have to deal with that with the whole move, get the bills organised and gah...

All the grown up stuff I've put on hold for two years.

At this point I just need my Hawaii Five-0 holiday.

Crossposts: http://eumelia.dreamwidth.org/601556.html

I want to believe...

... that one day I will blog again and that my thoughts will be arranged in paragraphs, instead of declarative sentences.

Hoping. Hoping.

I think once I move and my time changes a little, I'll be able to make these spaces work again.

I want to believe.

Did I mention I'm going to Hawaii?

Crossposts: http://eumelia.dreamwidth.org/601254.html

[Hawaii Five-0] Fic: Uncharted Territories

Title: Uncharted Territories
Author: [personal profile] eumelia/eumelia/[archiveofourown.org profile] Eumelia
Pairing/Characters: Danny/Steve, Mary/Kono, Danny Williams, Steve McGarrett, Grace Williams, Kono Kalakaua, Chin Ho Kelly, Joan McGarrett
Rating: R/Mature
Spoilers: n/a
Word Count 8298
Warnings: one scene contains near drowning.
Disclaimer: This is a work of transformative fiction, created for fun and pleasure. No copyright infringement is intended.
Author's Notes: I couldn't have done this without the patience and harsh criticism of my beta and wonderful friend Janet/@_valleygirl07. I couldn't have done this without you. Thank you so so much.

This fic was greatly inspired by the movies “Wings of Desire”, “City of Angels” and the show “Touched by an Angel” that I was obsessed with as a kid. I don't even know why at this point.

The title was inspired by the lyrics of Alanis Morissette's “Uninvited”, which is featured in the “City of Angels” soundtrack. Many of the songs on that soundtrack were listened to throughout the process of writing this fic.

This work is part of LJ's h50_reversebang, is accompanied by [archiveofourown.org profile] ignemferam's gorgeous fanart.
Summary: Danny is an angel with choices to make.
--

Danny sits by the bed of a dying man.Collapse )

Crossposts: http://eumelia.dreamwidth.org/600986.html

*tap tap* Is this thing on?

So, back in May I turned 29. Not the actual news I want to talk about.

I sometimes feels it's superfluous to write long entries, when I'm on twitter (not so much tumblr anymore, I haven't been there for the past month or so, unless someone links me a specific post) and I manage to regurgitate everything I want to say in short, declarative sentences.

This is helpful because I find myself completely frustrated with everything that's been happening and being able to just tweet "ARGH" at the world has been therapeutic.

Kind of.

Not really.

I took the time to skim through the blogging I did back in the 2006 and I'm amazed at what I managed to churn out during one of the most stressful times of my life. I can't even consider doing the same sort of thing now.

Moreover, it's hard to look back at who I was back then, trying so hard to justify the shit that was going on, out of some misplaced loyalty to people who are no longer friends.

I don't even know who is reading this anymore. If anyone. Maybe this like back in the beginning of my years on LJ and then DW, when I was just shouting at the void.

If you follow the news, you know my country is murdering people again.

I've been thinking about a lot of things to do with that lately.

I hope there is something left to salvage.

Meanwhile, hi? How are you?

Crossposts: http://eumelia.dreamwidth.org/600635.html

It's been a while

I know.

I don't even know what I have to say. All my little thoughts are scattered throughout the day on twitter, sitting on my ass and actually writing something coherent is kinda overwhelming.

So what's the what?

I'm still at my all-damn-day-job. Which pretty much my life, eating up my time and brain.

I got promoted! In this job I've been at for nearly two years, I didn't think I had the ambition or the guts to actually try to climb the corporate latter, but here I am.

Still living at home.

I've made friends and lost some friends over the past few months. I need to clean up this place a little, cobwebs everywhere, icons that don't reflect my life or my interests, bios that are two years out of date.

Everything is strange.

I feel strange.

But I'm here.

Crossposts: http://eumelia.dreamwidth.org/600371.html

Thus Endeth...

2013 has been my leanest year by far when it comes to writing here, the reasons are multifaceted and strange, but they the main one is that I have been sucked into the world of micro-blogging.

It may surprise you to hear, but I do very well on twitter (the link to it is on the upper left corner there). The content is pretty exactly the same there and it was here - feminism, fandom, queeriosity, politics, etc.

But friends, I have over 400 followers. That's not as many as some, I don't think my influence is that great - pah! Look at my ego go - but people like what I have to say, this is amazing to me at times.

I suspect that if I could have DW/LJ open at the office (and I sort of can, in a way, now that I think about it) I'd blog more. You see, I work 9 hours a day, 5 days a week (sometimes weekends) and I really love my job, but it doesn't really give me time to write long form. Texting quickly is where it's at and with my job, being connected to social media actually helps, so getting lost in the friends list may not be wise - but it might help my sanity? Who knows, I'm not sure.

I'm still living with my parents, 2013 was the year in which I did not move out, basically.

One thing that keeps me happy is fandom. I'm still watching "Hawaii Five-0" despite feeling like it reached it's peak in episode 3.15 and then took a nosedive to a place I sometimes find myself thinking "what the fuck am I watching?", but Scott Caan, Danny and his relationships with the team keep me going and keep me inspired, so I'm not giving up yet.

It has made me a bit lonely, though. Not being a multi-shipper (the little sparks of Danny/Kono and Danny/Mary and Danny/Almost-anyone-let's-face-it notwithstanding) I find myself a bit estranged from some of the fandom friends I've made when I realised that the majority of the McDanno fans aren't what I'd call home.

I feel very torn and pulled, floating along with the very few with whom I can gush and lose my head with and the fact that the rest of time I feel policed and annoyed.

Them's the breaks, I guess. I'm hoping the upcoming episodes uplift me a bit, knowing a few of the spoilers help when they don't make me fucking anxious because I trust Peter Lenkov et al about as much I trust the piece of Lego I stepped on.

I do hope to get back to writing long form, again.

That's what the arbitrary changing of dates is for, right?

See you on the flipside.

Tumblr crossover

Crossposts: http://eumelia.dreamwidth.org/599658.html

Dec. 21st, 2013

I'm very much alive and tweeting and blogging on other platforms.

What can I do to revitalise these places?

Crossposts: http://eumelia.dreamwidth.org/599145.html

Tags:

Title: Make Me a Day (Make Me Whole Again)
Author: [personal profile] eumelia/eumelia
Pairing/Characters: Mary McGarrett, Danny Williams, Grace Williams, Joan McGarrett
Rating: PG/General Audiences
Spoilers: up tp 4.09 Hauʻoli La HoʻomaikaʻI
Word Count 2316
Warnings: N/A
Disclaimer: This is a work of transformative fiction, created for fun and pleasure. No copyright infringement is intended.
Author's Notes: So it appears I have a series? What can I say, Mary is inspiring.

A major thanks to Perspi for the beta over Thanksgiving. Couldn't do it without you, babe!

The title is from the lyrics of Tori Amos' Baker Baker.

I suggest you read the first part of this series first. The World Has Gone Crazy (I'm Glad I'm Not You) to be found on DW, LJ and AO3, as you prefer.

Summary: "Don't worry about it," he says, like it's completely reasonable that twice in two weeks she appeared out of nowhere on his doorstep.

---

Mary hates cryingCollapse )

Crossposts: http://eumelia.dreamwidth.org/599001.html
Title: The World Has Gone Crazy (I'm Glad I'm Not You)
Author: [personal profile] eumelia/eumelia
Pairing/Characters: Danny Williams, Mary McGarrett, Joan McGarrett
Rating: G/General Audiences
Spoilers: 4.07 Ua Nalohia
Word Count 2015
Warnings: N/A
Disclaimer: This is a work of transformative fiction, created for fun and pleasure. No copyright infringement is intended.
Author's Notes: This coda is only just a little late. I'm a slow writer.
I love Danny and I love Mary and there should be more of them spending time together. The title is from Don McLean's Wonderful Baby. More lyrics from the same song can be found in the body of the fic itself.
My biggest thanks to Perspi and Iby who beta'd this with so much care. Thank you, babes.
Summary: Mary stands in front of the door for a long moment, holding Joan tightly in her arms, staring at the frame and the doorbell.

- - - -

Mary stands in front of the door for a long momentCollapse )

Crossposts: http://eumelia.dreamwidth.org/598758.html

More Thoughts for H50 4.05 “Kupuʻeu”

These are slightly more meta in nature so bear with me, there will be some bitching regarding the direction the show decided to take the whole Billy plot.

Let me first begin that I have to give kudos to the show because they decided to fridge a man in order to give a woman angst. It’s very rare that it happens that way (usually it’s woman dies and man angsts) and it would have made an interesting moment on an otherwise very conservative show.

Alas, did anyone care about Billy?

If you did, then I’m sorry he died. I didn’t care, nor did a great many people. Many cared about Governor Jameson, many care about Jenna Kaye, a great very many cared about Malia (whose death is the most comparable to Billy’s).

It’s debatable as to whether Pat Jameson or Jenna had to die (I don’t think they needed to, personally), but I think it’s blatantly clear that Malia, as a character, did not need to be killed off in order to motivate Chin. And considering that part of Chin has been left utterly untouched and unexplored, Malia’s death was also superfluous.

This is what will happen with Billy, only worse.

Unlike Malia, whose relationship with Chin was cultivated over two seasons and her death was gutting (and fucking unnecessary), Billy was introduced at the end of S3 and was basically slammed by the two male leads throughout his entire existence.

How am I supposed to care about him, because Cath cares? Cath barely talked about him, most of our information about Billy came from Steve (who gave Billy the side eye at the end of 4.04) and well, the emotional arc was mediocre.

Throughout the ep once he’s dead, Billy’s worthiness of love and emotional connection was completely reliant on his status as a SEAL and hero. Cath’s angst would have been moving had their relationship actually been developed and not talked about in a maligning way by Danny (a wholly unnecessary character assassination that brought us absolutely nowhere).

So will there be character development for Cath? I doubt it, because frigding only pushes a character so far.

The attempt to create a moving and meaningful moment for Cath fell flat because the writing deflected what could have been an actual adult relationship between exes, into silly soap opera “Love Triangle” drama to create tension that never existed.

Do better show and give us some actual meat to chew on.

Tumblr crosspost

Crossposts: http://eumelia.dreamwidth.org/597783.html
Joe and Danny’s scene was superb, superb, superb. In your smug face, Joe. Danny’s loyalty and compassion are impenetrable to your manipulation and instrumentalism! MAWHAHAH!

I think if there’s one thing that got pummelled into us today is that every one of Steve’s parental figures is a horrible human being. Doris, because ultimately the fact that she wanted to be a mother doesn’t mean she was actually cut out for it. Jack, for abandoning his kids once Doris decided she’d rather have adventures than be a teacher and full time mom. Joe, for his manipulative ulterior motives and using Steve like a tool for his own gains.

Always with making Steve a tool and making him feel worthless, huh, parental units.

Chin shouting at Kono to get out moved me a lot. Chin’s eyes, my god, berserk and worried and he’d fly to Hong Kong right now if he could.

The sat-phone is the most obvious thing in the world, the Yakuza could have snatched her right there, seriously.

However, I was mainly bored by this episode.

I wasn’t interested in Billy. I’m not interested in Cath. I’m not interested in Steve/Cath, so the focus of the ep and the procedural left me distracted.

Oh, except when Steve espoused his stupid sexist ideas regarding motive (“Woman scored” and “unrequited love”?). Seriously show, seriously. A little humanity is all I ask for.

And then I got angry about the Navy and the Military and the fact that show loves them a little too much.

Cut for unpopular opinionsCollapse )

Tumblr crosspost

Crossposts: http://eumelia.dreamwidth.org/597710.html
I think this is the first episode of the season that made me truly happy.

If fact I was so happy I actually posted a short incoherent tumblr entry that included this image:



Yes, that's how fucking ridiculous I felt about this episode, or more specifically, about Danny in this episode.

Because he fucking rocked.

SpoilersCollapse )

Tumblr Crosspost

Crossposts: http://eumelia.dreamwidth.org/597292.html

Good Things in H50 4.03

Danny held a baby. He also gave her a stuffed monkey that used to belong to Grace. He called the baby a monkey.

Chin went to band camp. He plays the trumpet. He likes Jazz music.

Max and Steve are bffs, of course they are.

There was a fuck tonne of X-Files references and Jerry called Danny ‘Scully’. This warmed the cockles of my cold heart immensely.

And that’s what I liked.

I might write about the rest later on, but probably not, because I’ve cried enough as it is.

Tumblr crosspost

Crossposts: http://eumelia.dreamwidth.org/597156.html

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