This morning I got an apology from a class-mate.

I was honestly speechless.

Last week in class, Intro to Anthropology Exercise, in which spirits rose because were were discussing polygamy, marriage and all that.
The article we read had a description of a polygamous household of the Tib [sp?] tribe in an Anfircan country that may or may not still exist - the article is from the late 50's if I'm not mistaken - in which the Wives (who call each other Sister) tell the anthropologist that they take care of each other, help each other out with their children.
The first wife is "given" to the husband by her father, all the other consequent wives the First Wife choses.

I'm like, human commodification, not so different from traditional marriages in Judaism (well, contemporary ones in these parts, the woman doesn't even get to look at the Ketubah - marriage contract).

Any way - I was shocked that so many of my female class-mates said that they were really convinced by the women living in a polygamous house-hold, that they wouldn't mind having that kind of sisterhood.

In my mind I'm went: OMG! WHAT?!?! Do you not see!?!?

What I said was: Hello, human commodification!
And some guy replied: You're really exaggerating! You know that's what they say about Marriage in Judaism?
I replied: Yes, that's why a bride costs 2 cents (2 prutot), because she isn't being bought!

He went on a bit about how what marriage was and wasn't, while I'm being called out on being waaaaaay radical about marriage.

Bullshit, of course.

Any way, today the guy with whom I argued last week apologized for his attitude and for being over aggressive.

See me be gobsmacked!

I told a friend about this this morning and she said don't let it get it out that men who behave nicely make you speechless.
Funny, haha.
I'm just not used to twenty-something men (sometimes boys) to actually take responsibility for stuff said in class.
No doubt he thought he was doing the gentlemanly thing, which I'm cool with when it is sans condescension and patronising (I can be a gentleman too!) - but wow, it was just so weird.

Regardless, it's weird being in this class, where I feel I'm gaining new perspective! But damn am I ahead of the class when it comes to theory and critical thought. I'm not bragging here - I'm a bloody Third Year taking an intro class... *sigh* Well, that's the cake I baked from the eggs that I broke.

Things I grew tired of hearing a long time ago:

#01 "You're aggressive" - You make me want to rip out your rib cage and wear it like a hat (h/t Spike/Willian the Bloody terrible poet, he was a brilliant word-smith...).

#02 "You're provocative" - I make you uncomfortable, not my problem!

#03 Rape apologia - Even if a woman (or man) is walking around, naked, with a placard stating in neon "Will Fuck Anyone!", no one has the right to violate his/her/hir body. Ever. Rape is a crime, stop punishing and blaming the victims.

#04 The term "self-hating Jew" - the next time I hear this term I'm calling on that person and saying they are an "Antisemitic shit-bag". Jewish self-hatred assumes some kind of essential Jewish trait that us (yeah, I'm one of those people) self-haters reject because we're just that disgusting.
Antisemitic Shit-Baggery!

#05 "You've lost weight, you look great!" - I know I've lost weight. I know I comply with the fashionable female body type. I'd appreciate it if no one comments about my body, it's fucking irritating, I'm not livestock to be commented upon, my my rump, ribs and tits are not in public for your consumption! Unless you've been given permission to do so (you know who you are), do stop!

#06 "You look much better now that your hair in longer. The shaved head didn't look good on you".
DIAF.

#07 "Is this another feminist thing?" - Yeah it is, and you're gonna listen to me annoy the fucking hell out of you!

#08 "You're so sensitive" - Yeah, this is me crying over your dead body.

#09 "You're so loud, why do you have to shout everything. It's all about how you say things you know" - Yeah I do know, I also know a big STFU when I see one. Stop trying to control my fucking tone!

And #10 "Why do you care so much?" - because the world is an ugly, cynical and corrupted blemish in this universe. We have to live on it, it may as well be with a modicum of empathy and dignity.

Those are the Top 10 things this week that made me go *rawr*, *arrgh*, swear under my breath, glare, lose my temper and want to throw things at people's faces.

I cannot wait for the semester to start (which it does this Sunday).

Tell me friends, readers and maybe lurkers, what grinds your gears?

Wow, I haven't updated in almost a week!

Well, here are a few fun things to know. On Sunday and Monday (in which [Southern!Girl] was around and much fun was had) was the annual LGBT Studies/Queer Theory conference An Other Sex.
It was great fun, like all conferences, some panels and lectures were better than others, but nothing tops seeing all the various types of dyks, fags, fag-hags, butch, femme, genderqueers, transmen, transbois, tranwomen, transgrrls, bykes, omnis and everything under the sun and rocks.

That and I got to actually be a part of the proceedings by being a simultaneous translator, along with a fellow dyke, for the Keynote Speaker (Prof. Lee Edelman) who wanted to hear the panel conducted in memory of Eve Kosofsky Sedgwick (z"l) who passed away this past April from breast cancer.

I think next year I'll feel confidant enough to maybe read a paper of my own.
Here's to hoping.

Funnily enough, one of the speakers was Prof. Nancy Pollikoff who spoke about Marriage and basically why we should be rid of it. Now, I had planned to write my own spiel about why I think Marriage should be abolished, but thanks to _yggdrasil, I don't need to, because she linked to shemale's brilliant post on the matter:

I've said this elsewhere, but never really made a post about it:

I don't support marriage.

For anyone.

Or, to be more clear, i think that it shouldn't be an institution with any legal merit. To give even more slack here, i don't think that it should hold exclusive privileges over any other kind of relationship... Although its discriminatory history and present make me inclined to think that it should be considered, legally speaking, completely irrelevant.

The exclusive bundling of certain rights and protections leaves those who can't get married, or don't have that type of relationship or family structure that they would feel comfortable with that kind of ceremony but who do need some or all of those rights and protections, in really shitty situations. And it always will.

Go read the rest.

Something else that comes to mind and that I'd been meaning to link and write about is rm's post about how women are really constructed in our culture(s) - because despite the various geographical and historical differences in Patriarchy this principle holds true everywhere.
Women are not themselves, they are for others.
I'd quote the whole thing but it's better to go with the link and read the comments as well:

The first time I worked clinic defense was the month after I turned eighteen. Now, most people stood in a particular phalanx by the clinic door, especially during the worst of the protests. The phalanx was designed to make sure protesters couldn't crawl through our legs, that there would still be a barrier if they stuck us with pins, which, yes, they did. Then, there were the people stationed inside the clinic, if it had interior doors. Sometimes women would pose as patients and lock themselves to the interior doors, blocking them. Finally, there were the people who escorted the women in and out of the clinic.

I did all three of those jobs at various times, but mostly I either guarded the inside doors of the clinics or escorted patients.

Mostly, the women didn't talk. But sometimes they did, either about nothing in particular or dark humour. It was strange, responding to them, and always being so careful not to reveal any particular sentiment to them.

"I hate this," one woman said. I couldn't but nod, because "this" could have been anything.

She kept talking. "Always being escorted, like I can't go to the doctor by myself."

"I'm sorry, sometimes the protesters pose as patients; it's for everyone's safety."

"But I feel like a child."

And it's true.
I know for myself that I'm asked often in an exasperated tone, "What happened to you?", to me.
Why am I no longer the happy go lucky angel I used to be.
Why am I obsessed with the fact that my hair is a cause of uproar in the family - if it's long it's beautiful, if it's short it should be grown, when it's shaved I'm being deliberately provocative and upsetting my parents and going against all the values I should uphold.

And while I don't use my hair or any part of my body to be deliberately provocative, it happens anyway, because my body being feminine is public and my heart and mind are queer*.
And so long as these facts remain true (most likely for the rest of my life) I will do my best to very deliberatly fuck with the status quo.

It makes me happy.

Happy International Pride Month My Pretties!

*Thank you rm for that turn of phrase.

I find myself at a loss as to what to write about.

The first week of semester, it's rough, but I'm dealing. Went to sleep far too late, but luckily I have Wednesdays off so I'll probably sleep in tomorrow.
Hooray.

[Southern!Girl] is coming over for the weekend (OMG! YAYZ!) the Friday of which will consist of a family supper, including cousins and such.
There will be much Doctor Who, Torchwood, snuggling with Wish and each other, and very likely studying together while listening to Tom Leher.
Yes, we are that geeky and dorky.

More things of substance to come!

My tolerance for people has never been particularly high. I'm very picky about the people I'm willing to be friends with and I unfortunately tend to form strong opinions very quickly, so if someone said, done or have an attitude that grates me... I'm afraid it would take a hell of a lot to make me consider that someone worth any kind of positivity from me.

The one kind of attitude I can't fucking stand, really, it pisses me off beyond grating, is the "I'm so speshul" attitude.

A small disclaimer; I have my own incidences in which I'm completely narcissistic and think I'm the best thing that ever happened. This is a normal thing for people who know they're smart, I think.
But when [editorial] you are only saying something in a class discussion that isn't in aid of putting forth a standpoint, but in fact to put yourself in the spot light, you're an ass.
No, really.
You are.
I'm sorry I'm being vague, but I dislike demonizing particular people on the Internet, especially since I'm not locking this post as it's actually something worth talking about.

In a class forum, especially in a class in which sexuality and gender identity is on the table (it being a Queer Theory class), your own individual personal sexuality isn't what's being discussed.
It's one thing and a very good thing, to say out loud, that the discussion is excluding certain sexualities and identities (e.g. bisexuality and genderqueer). It's another to say that it affects you personally.
No, sorry, that's someone with an attitude problem.
And I may sound harsh, but I cannot stand it when people decide to use a class forum to show off their "spedhulness".
It's neither the time nor the place.
You want to talk about your own sexuality, there are breaks and after-class discussions. I mean, c'mon, we're a bunch of intellectual queers... this is what we do.
It rubs me the wrong way.
I (try to) participate in classes. I have things to say. I try to make them a standpoint and not a "personal opinion" or a "personal issue" mainly because, every word I say is ideological and very obviously a "personal" thing, unless I'm very specifically playing Devil's Advocate - but that's a whole different kettle of fish (where does that saying come from).

There are certain types of "speshul" people.
Not just the type described above.

There's also the type that feels the need to tell you, that because they like something in a certain way, then liking that same something in a different way is wrong.
For example, I was talking to this person about Alan Moore and how I'm really pre-supposed to hating the new "Watchmen" movie, mainly because I hate, despise Zack Snyder.
Hate. That. Director.
A lot.
Aesthetics mean a lot... but not enough to cover up the badness and complete lack of directorial abilities.
But I digress.
Any way, this person totally agrees and inside I'm all "yay, Moore fan!" and then he says "I really hated the Vendetta movie as well".
And I was like "What? How come? I mean, it was a very cute adaptation? Wachowski Sibs!"
He goes: "It completely butchered the meaning of the book, which is one of the few works that managed to show Anarchy as interesting".
(I refrain from bringing up "The Dispossessed" by Ursula K. Le Guin).
I say: "I enjoyed it and..." before I can finish my thought about the movie making it's own statement about freedom, government and other things like that, he interrupts and says:
"I guess I'm more of a political hard-liner than you"

What is with people?
Seriously?
Do you know me? I think not. I'll tell you something, I now know this guy a hell of a lot better now than before and I hope the hostility I transmit reaches him loud and clear.

People are people, I know.
And I can understand how misanthropy develops and becomes ones default position when it comes to interaction with others.
I really hope I retain my love for humanity for a little bit longer, despite the fact that I'm encountering these characters.

Objectivism is the epistemological equivalent of "My eyes are closed you can't see me because I can't see you".
But I digress.

I went to the Randroid fan club on Wedensday night with the expectation that I'd be amused.
I wasn't.
I felt sorry for the guy (to be known from now on as [Ranroid!Boy]) who decided to open this "philosophical discussion club" and was didactidly lecturing (much like Rand did in her books) on the basics of Objectivist thought.
I found myself both bored and irritated when my attmpts at explaining the Linguistic Turn didn't go so well... or at all. [Randroid!Boy] was ignoring my terrible "relativist" ways.

The guy was insidiously benign. He told us he discovered Rand in his twenties! He must live a really sheltered life.
Nothing he was saying could actually be pin pointedly seen as bad.
He spoke about the "tennents of Objectivism", the whole man as a heroic figure and the not living for anyone else or asking anyone to live for me.
But rand didn't invent that, nor did she perfect anything, she merely made fascist aesthetics into uber-individualism and too the idea of Nietzsche's Übermensch and positioned it into her economic ideal of Capitalism.
Never mind that Randroids ignore the fact that there are life circumstances that create different life experiences and that you cannot remove them from your own identity.

[Randroid!Boy] didn't get into the supremacy idea, something that many Objectivists seem to forget. The belief that if I just do whatever is good for Me and that that is the best thing completley negates the liberty of other people.
It doesn't matter that you say "everyone else is free to do the same".
Because we are social animals, no matter how terribly we treat each other, there is a need for relationships and inter-relation.

The most ridiculous thing that was mentioned in this little fan club meeting: someone (not me) tried to make a point that not everyone is in a position to think about free will (which is imperative in Randian thought and probably the biggest hole in what is already a swiss cheese system of philosophy) and are able to only think about survival, like a starving child in Africa (actual example used, by the way... not say... a starving child in Gaza... we like to keep things academic). [Randroid!Boy] used that as an example to "prove" the argument as selfishness as an ideal, one does everything to save themselves first.
What?!
I was shocked.
I shouldn't have been.
But c'mon!
There are forces that create circumstances that lead to that child's starvation people!
What the hell is wrong with these people?!

Two actually funny things that kind of disproved [Randroid!Boy]'s entire standing of living an Objectivist life were these:
1) He asked peope not to be late.
Zing! You lose... how dare you impose your own time table on others! What, you expect them to do something for you!
2) He took into account people's abilities.
Zing! You lose again... what abilities are these? You are either a hero or you aren't. If you aren't you're not a human and are of no consequence, etc. etc. etc.
Logical Fallacy!
Error!
Error!
Arrrgh!

Anyway, I'll not be going back, of course. There were only 15 or so people and I know of one other person who will not be going back... hopefully this little club will wallow and die.

---

Oh artists and graphically astute people: would one of you be kind and generous enough to take the philosophical thought written below and icon-ise it with a an actual "Calvin and Hobbes" cartoon?

Calvinian-Hobbesianism: A relationship that is based on the knowledge that reality is a direct product of interaction with imagination.

Thank you in advance!

On Monday the 17th of November, Professor Cathrine MacKinnon - yes, that MacKinnon - gave a guest lecture at a joint event put together by the Tel-Aviv Uni Law Department and my very own Women and Gender Program.

My friend [Gossip!Girl] and I had been *squeeing* about this lecture ever since we got the notices about it, so for about a week we were going around Gilman (the Humanities building) talking about MacKinnon. She is such a celeb!
On the day, Monday, we decided to seat ourselves about hour before the lecture was scheduled, which was a good call, because half an hour before it was due the hall (which can house approx. 200) was packed. People were sitting on the floor and milling outside the door.

There were short opening speeches by the event organizers and the department heads of Law and the Women & Gender Program.

And then she spoke.

I feel I should mention that the woman is tall, with an awe inspiring presence. The minute she walked into the hall the energy spiked and it revolved around her. She began her lecture and wow! she speaks like she writes; no holds barred, with fire and no-nonsense.
She's not just awe-inspiring, she's just plain inspiring.
She cuts through the bullshit and spreads out the reality of the world like an Augur (yes I know they had to be of the masculine persuasion) cutting open the guts of a goat.
Only we're the goat and the guts sure aren't pretty.
And with that lovely metaphor in mind, you may have an idea of the way she speaks and writes her radical theory (despite being active through mainstream channels).
I jotted down some bullet points that I found to be important in her lecture. I hope you can forgive my own disjointed interpretation of her points and for mangling her ideas and very impressive speaking style.

Finally, I'd like to note that I'm not writing down MacKinnon unexamined, she has plenty to account for in her theory and practice and of course by trying to recreate what she spoke of and what I myself to be of import, I'm immersing my own ideas and opinions.
Without further adieu:

The lecture was titled "Gender - The Future", which is vague to say the least.
MacKinnon began the lecture by mentioning a sci-fi book published in the 1970's titles Woman on the Edge of Time by Marge Piercy. In this book two potential futures are presented - an androgynous future in which gender (or sex roles) are abolished and the term "equality" is redundant. The second is a future in which sex is nothing bu pornography, television depicts the degradation of women and reality copies and performs what is depicted.

MacKinnon rhetorically asks towards which future are we headed, confidant that we know.
And we do.
The lives of some women are better due to the women's movement.
Women as a group are not yet free or equal anywhere. Blatantly inserting myself here for mo, because I really can't ignore the underlying essentialism of this statement - the reality is that no one is free (equality is not equivalent to freedom) and the categories of the binary Genders subjugate us into the roles we are taught to perceive and believe as natural. Woman, as a gender category, has historically (and currently) been the most oppressed gender (intersectionality brought into account of course).

The question which is posited in this reality (both MacKinnon's essentialist one and the constructionist I put forth) is why? Why are women still the oppressed and subjugated group?
What do women need liberation from?
MacKinnon answers: The all encompassing male domination - a domination of masculinity despite the criticism under which it has been put since the 1970's.
One of the reasons for this reality is the sexualisation of power, which today is easily translated as Profit, this is visible through pornography and prostitution, which in turn is made up of women who have been abused and continue to be abused. MacKinnon really doesn't make any distinction, to her all sex workers are victims and those who say otherwise are trapped in a false consciousness, which is, ha, ridiculous.

What isn't ridiculous is that through the media and pop-culture consciousness is dictated and through this dictation we, society, learn and recreate the Gender hierarchy which is promoted in order to keep women sexually available. Therefore, MacKinnon makes this brilliant leap, the economy is interested in keeping gender inequality because it's good for business. The economy, that is the Capitalist industries of sex and entertainment, make their profit off women being sexually available.

Because this is a Capitalist structure, the training of women to be this way begin in the family - the nuclear family which the smallest unit (not the individual - one can't be a good Capitalist, if you don't have someone House Keeping and Rearing) in the Capitalist economy. In this unit we replicate and are taught the values we need to succeed and the ideals of who we must be in order to be Normal.

Normal is that men want women who want to be sexually used.

MacKinnon posits that this pattern of masculine dominance begins and is replicated, as mentioned, in a family unit in which children are sexually abused.
This, we know, happens far more often than statistics can even begin to show.

Girls who are abused grow up to be "everyone", with a high percentage of abused women in the sex industry. The vast majority of abusers are men, very likely to have been abused themselves as boys - almost no statistics on sexually abused boys exist and the stats that do exist more likely show an extremely small percentage of what actually happens.
Abused boys have two choices according to MacKinnon - become allies with a socially inferior group (women) or become abusers (men).
In other, shorter words:
Girl children who are abused continue to be abused. This is Gender Feminine.
Boy children who are abused become abusers. This is Gender Masculine.
And what is needed is solidarity among women and men who are aware of this dynamic.

Whew!
That's a lot of info isn't it?

MacKinnon is dated in her theory, because she really does still lump all women together and is binary in the way she posits the categories of gender.
Beyond that essentialist streak, she ignores the fact that there are feminist sex workers, who work within the industry both mainstream and alternative and aim to change it.
I would hardly call the indie Lesbian erotica, mainstream industrial pornography - it really is more like art and why can't sex be viewed in that way - is entertainment not art either?
And yes, people get paid for entertaining others and sexuality is a part of that and really, that isn't the issue.
The issue is lumping the entirety of sexual entertainment as porn, which I feel is what always got MacKinnon (and Andrea Dworkin and the rest of the Anti-Pron movement in the 70's and 80's) a whole lot of flak.

The guts of her argument aren't pretty and MacKinnon herself seems to be aware of the short comings in her theory and the way she presents her theory (at least, I like to believe so), I think this happens because MacKinnon has to be able to use her theory in praxis - that is through the mainstream channels - the Law, in MacKinnon's case.

It was a fascinating lecture, with plenty to argue about and dig deeper, she presents a very disturbing root cause of why humanity does what it does.
It's worth thinking about and breaking apart again and again.
Also, one doesn't go to see MacKinnon speak in order to agree or disagree, you go to see a Very Important Person in action.
And it was totally worth it.

And you, my vastly intelligent friends, readers and lurkers, what are your thoughts on what I've presented here?

Is it funny, or sad that there's an Ayn Rand Club for Philosophy Students at my Uni and they're spamming the entire Humanities student body's email.
The first meeting is next Wedesnday.

Do I go and mock?
Or do I avoid the proto-fascist crazies?

Help me out dear friends.

I'm just... who would have thought? Randians on campus, and they could be anyone. Cooo! Maybe I should go and scope in order to know who to avoid for the rest of my academic career.
When I was a teenager I was a Randian, read all her books, felt that I was Smarter and More Capable than Thou... loved "The Selfish Ideal".
Then I finished adolescence.
Like may things Randinism is a phase.
How can people, students of high theory, philosophy and such actually consider this woman to be anything other than a stylish author!?
Digressing over.

So? Should I stay or should I go? *duh-na-na-na-naa*

On November 5ht (Never Forget *Solidarity Fist*), which is the day I found out about Obama's election since I didn't stay up all night in order to view the process, I was talking to a bunch of friends and we were all recounting what a great speaker he is and what a great sense of humour he has.
"His father send him from Krypton!"
Peels of laughter from the politically aware comic books geeks of the Literary Studies department of Tel-Aviv University.
Me?
Disconnected from reality?
Pfft.

In any event, Sinfest continue to make that narrative fun and appealing: ( Today's Sinfest )

Also, since I feel the need to continue being the dork; it's been a while since I posted a Just Some Random Guy Marve/DC theater video.
Enjoy the latest installment in I'm a Marvel... I'm a DC... Happy Hour:

School is on for tomorrow!

I'm happy that I'm starting this year on time and without any hold ups.
Hopefully this year will be quite normal on that front.

Over the next few days I'll report on what I'm doing there and I'll probably get more in the swing of returning to regular blogging.
Though I believe that will happen when Frida returns from Laptop Hospital *hopes*.

And now I'm going to prepare for Bedfordshire and get my bag ready for tomorrow.

Ah, Uni.

It might even be a fun year.
One things for sure... this time I'm doing all my exams on the first run, unless dire injury stops me, there's no way I'm postponing exams again.
Definitely learned my lesson with that one.

The Good News.

In my cold, wet hands I now hold the Ultimate 2-Disc Edition of Iron Man.

Oh yes.

Oh so very yes.

Just as my fandom excitement began to dwindle due to the fact that I hadn't watched it in a while, the Universe (and the post office) decided that Yesterday would be the day for me to receive this little bundle of Movie Magic, too bad I couldn't actually get it yesterday due to some bureaucratic cock up.
But today.
They can kiss my shiny metal ass (it's actually peachy fuzz, but eh. Details).

The Bad News.

Who wants to go to Uni this year?

*raises hand*

Who, in fact, is getting screwed over by the Ministry of Finance by dragging their feet and allowing this catastrophic academic mishap.

*raises hand with thousands of other students and the Ministry of Education*

Speaking of the MoE... what an utter disappointment Minister Tamir has been. You really can't compare her to the unmitigated disaster that was Limor Livnat, but she was such a hope. I mean, here's an actual academic, someone who actually worked as a teacher!
And she somehow allowed her Ministry to be fucked over by venture capitalist pigs.
Ugh!

The WTF! News.

Related to the Bad News. The campus treasury sent me a notice asking for more money on top of the advance that I've already paid them.
This is not the tuition money.
This is most likely something to keep the admin office head above water.

This is so fucked up.
I cannot even describe it.

But at least I'll get to watch Iron Man today. So not everything is wrong with the world.
Right?

I'm blocked.

I have, like, lots of ideas for entires that may or may not be interesting to other people, but they're definitely interesting to me.
I mean, I've been reading all sorts of things critiques about the economic bail out and the economy in general, since many Lefties are calling for reform and saying "Nyah! We told you this system was bad *razzberry*".
I mean, it does sort of seem like that doesn't it?

In any event I'm not writing anything in depth about the economy, or the local political situation which may keep me from beginning University on time.
Again.
Fuck the ministry of finance!
You fucking suck!
Economic disparity is bad for everyone, but fuck fuckity fuck!!! If someone deserved to get their ass bitten in the current financial climate it would the minister of fucking finance, Bar-On - the two fingered slaute is way, WAY to mild for what I fantasize about happening to you - you greedy, over-paid, neo-liberal, lying, double dealing fascist shit!

And yes, I know, it's bad form to wish ill on anyone in general and specifically on the Eve of Yom Kippur, just before we're supposed to be Atoning for sins we committed amongst ourselves and God.
Screw it, okay?!
I'm an Irreverent Heretic no matter which way you look at it.
But yeah, Days of Awe will be done tomorrow and I must say... wasn't feeling too Awesome this year.
Last year I felt a much deeper connection to what was going on, even before we went to schul, but this year I think I'm in a spiritually numb place... or my peak has come and gone, or it's yet to come over Sukkot which is next week.
In any event.
Feck it.

I'll probably blog something nice, meta-ish or critique-y later on.

Today on the News I watched an Economic Commentator compare the bailout plan to a defibrillator shock.
That comparison really scared me, because after reading The Shock Doctrine, which was one of the first economic commentaries/exposes I'd ever read, I've been trying to keep a keener eye and ear out for the language used by pundits, politicians and sound bite economists.

The worst thing about this is that the really wealthy won't notice this, those whose entire capital was invested in stock will get benefits from this bailout and thus will be able to go on their merry way, while inflation goes over board and unemployment abounds.

I'm parroting the News and I can't help but wonder, do these people understand who inflation and unemployment hurts most? Are they aware that small businesses (like my father's) can go under simply by employing people, because prices soar and no one can pay a salary because no one can afford because the customers themselves lose their job and are forced to go onto welfare and social security... which in my little Hell Hole is dwindling and dwindling.

I myself am also thinking about my future. What I'm to do with my degree in Useless studies Lit. and Gender studies.
I once thought of getting an MA or Certificate in Information/Library studies.
But when I think about what I really want to do and considering what I'd like to use my degree for, I always think of my mother, who is a teacher.
And this week a friend of the family who runs a chapter of an organization that tries to encourage education/literacy among the Indigenous people in Australia. She and her Significant Other (who also works at this NGO) were telling me about some of the projects and the young teachers that work at the organization and all I could think was "yes, yes... this is what makes the difference".
I'm still young enough to remember that I thought teachers were idiots and that I almost all of them.
Except my literature teachers in Junior High and High School.
And my Drama teacher from when I was 11 'till 14.
And sometimes I fantasize about being that kind of influence, if that one awkward weird kid can look back and think... I'd like to be like that.

Real world cynicism (and having a parent as a teacher) lets me know that fantasy aside, being a teacher is a thankless job in today's economic reality, especially in Israel where if you don't have tenure you barely get enough pay to make ends meet.

So... yeah.
This is what I think about when I have time. And I get memory streams, but that's the subject of a different entry.

No More Classes!
No More Books!
No More Teacher's Dirty Looks!*

*No offense meant to any educators on my f-list or those who read my LJ... you know I love you guys!

Also, don't ask me how it went, I don't want to think about this anymore. I'm starting my second year and this one is over.
November here I come!



"Free" by VAST

it's time to laugh it's time to cry
it's time to be what you need to be
it won't be long 'til they are gone
and we can be what we want to be
i wanna run from everything
everything that holds me down
nothing to win nothing to lose
you can't tell me what to do anymore
you can't tell me what to do anymore
now i'm free
now i'm free
now i'm free
i'm gonna run
i'm gonna win
i'm gonna do what i need to do
'cause it's time to be what I need to be
it's time to be what i need to be
you can't tell me what to do anymore
you can't tell me what to do anymore
now i'm free
now i'm free
now i'm free
oh yeah
i want to hold air in my hand
own the one thing you can't buy
nothing to win nothing to lose
it's time to be what i need to be
i'm gonna run from everything
everything that holds me down
nothing to win nothing to lose
it's time to be what i need to be
you can't tell me what to do anymore
you can't tell me what to do anymore
now i'm free
now i'm free
now i'm free

Not.

How was everyone's first day back at school?
Teachers, I hope the little shits didn't give you too much trouble.
Pupils, I hope those authoritarian fascists didn't give you a hard time.

Me? Oh, no. I'm neither teacher nor pupil.
My school starts in November, which is still a long way off to go.
I still have three papers to write and my last make up exam is on the 25th of September... yes, that's when I'll be done with the Hell that this year has been.
But what do I have to complain about? It's still summer and I even managed to get into a bathing suit this year - I know, shocking.

Here's to a new school year!

And hey, any of you who is near/in Gustav, my thoughts are with you - fuck that government.

There was a small conference about Sexual Harassment on Campus.

It's a subject that has been hitting the Israeli Blogosphere (both feminist and otherwise) over the past month or so because a very brave Master's student by the name of Ortal Ben-Dayan (אורטל בן דיין) published her experience as a BA student and the affair she had with her Sociology Professor at the Hebrew University in Jerusalem.
Her biting and humour filled article can be read in Hebrew here.

Ms. Ben-Dayan breaks down her experience with this man and contextualizes it within the prism of Ashkenazi Academic Elite and her being a minority woman of colour (she is Mizrahi, specifically of Moroccan descent) and how that affected the unequal balance of power already present within the Professor-Student dynamic.

Ms. Ben-Dayan was one of the four speakers at this little conference and she spoke with dignity and without shame, though she admitted that speaking aloud about her experience is much more embarrassing than just writing about on a social commentary on-line magazine - Ha'Oketz.

All four speakers were excellent and touched on different issues concerning power, identity and the treatment sexual harassment receives in the public and how despite University campus' being considered the same as any other work place under the Sexual Harassment Law in Israel, almost no legal action is done to prevent it. There are no workshops for lecturers, students and campus workers in the subject, when there are supposed to be.
At this point getting a complaint to even be addressed is difficult - there is a hot-line students that have been sexually harassed (women only volunteers) can call, they give counseling and information on what can be done.

But it seems like such a drop in the ocean.

Another great thing about this panel was that three of the women were of colour; two of them Mizrahi Jewish women, one the aformentioned sociology MA student (Ortal Ben-Dayan) and a lawyer (Dr. Yifat Biton); the other (ha! pun) a Palestinian social worker (Ragjda Alnabulsi) and the fourth woman was a Lesbian Ashkenazi women (Dorit Abramovitch).

I was really impressed with what they had to say.

It also brought to my mind all the little sexual harassments I've experienced over the years. I've never been raped or sexually assaulted, but that's because I've been insanely lucky - no more, no less.

All women have been sexually harassed. It's an everyday thing. I've been stripped (by that special gaze) more times than I can count, I've been "accidentally" touched more times than I can remember while I've stood in a crowded bus, train or street. I've been deliberately groped once when I fell asleep on a train. I've been told to smile. I've been told, while working for my father, cleaning his windows, that I'd look really good cleaning your windows. During gym classes I was whistled at and told I had a great rack. After those gym classes my bra strap would be pulled and snapped - my breasts jiggled. I was called bitch, whore, cunt, dyke, etc. etc.
I could go on.
But these are everyday things.
There is no need for anyone to be held accounted for.
Right?

Well, friends it looks like it's another long night finishing a paper, though oddly I'm not too stressed about despite having nothing but the title and curser[sp?] blinking at me from the effing Word document.

Did I mention that I hate this course as well?

It's intro to poetry and I think I've attended about four classes all in all.

Again, I'm oddly calm knowing I'll be spending most of the night awake working on this bloody paper.

---

Onto something different:
After years of being indifferent to Fiona Apple, I've finally gone and fallen in love with her music.

Especially this song:

It's not just the melody, it's the ( lyrics )

This song makes me feel as though it was written especially for me.
How often do you find a song like that?
Plus she sings so sweetly and girly like... I could just melt (and when I am able I will somehow acquire her other albums).

I've been a busy bee these past few days.
I had a fairly large exam today and handed in the paper I stayed up all night doing (same course, BTW). If I never touch this material again it will be too soon.

In two weeks the second semester exam season is to commence.
*glomps*

Monday and Tuesday there was a bunch of activity on campus planned and arranged by the Student Coalition (with your truly being one part of the planning and arranging team. Yes, I'm touting my own horn) regarding the Occupation, as June marked 41 years of the Occupation in Gaza and the West Bank).

On Monday we arranged an open discussion regarding the One State Solution and the Two State solution. It was great, as a whole bunch of opinions were heard and discussed.
The majority were Leftists, obviously - though the posters and fliers were worded to not be too demagogic or partial, we wanted the Mainstream student body to come a listen - of which there a few but out of thirty or so people that quickly dwindled to twenty to fifteen there weren't a whole lot of Liberals, though those that were there spiced things us a bit.There were no outright Rightists, as they know us and hate us... that's okay, we don't like them much either.

On Tuesday we had a myth busting session; an ICAHD activist gave a hugely informative lecture about the population control that goes on in the West Bank (specifically East Jerusalem, which is a world in and of itself within the Occupation discourse) under the guise of Security and how that word is used as a motivation for a whole slew of attacks against civilians in the West Bank (these attacks include House Demolitions, "Check Points", the Separation Wall etc. etc.).
After the ensuing discussion and break we had MBC reporter Qasem Hatib who came to talk to us about the "No Palestinian Partner" myth and discourse. We discussed how that particular discourse became prevalent in the Barak and Camp David years (and following) and how it has been used since then as a political tool by Israel to keep the status quo (not what he said, but what I gleaned from his very cynical journalistic words - such a pessimist, made us idealists all sad... kidding, I don't think I've ever met a bigger bunch of cynics than those in the Coalition).

Very successful half week so far, I'd say.

So it was a good, if stressful week on campus.
Wednesday was a bad day for Jerusalem.
A man went on a killing spree on a tractor. ( Read more about it, there is a plethora of links to be found behind )

Yeah I slept for four hours.
What of it?

As stated before, at least I finished that bloody paper and won't have to pull a White Night (an all nighter) again.
I'm not optimistic enough to think that this will be my last White Night... though it is my last in this particular course, which I will hopefully pass without too much humiliation.

With an exam in the same course in which I wrote the aforementioned paper on Wednesday and actual formal exam season starting in two weeks, my stress is up, though not as much as you'd think.
Staying up all night and going to sleep at dawn tends to mellow you out.

In any event, have a ( GIF )

It's amazing how much our perceptions are just a matter of arbitrary perspective.

Yesterday, I was telling my parents about the LGBT studies and Queer theory conference that went on at Uni (the eighth "The Other Sex" con at Tel-Aviv University) and was asked if everyone there was as strange as I.

They said it as a joke (or not, I try not to dwell), but I couldn't help but think about it in a more critical way.

Am I strange?
I mean, really?
And in any event, define "not strange", or "normal", or "normative" - none of those are synonymous.
So beyond that little venture into semantics land, I have to say that this year's conference was fun, as I actually knew some of the people speaking on the panels and understood the theory that was being discussed there. Last year, was my first Queer academic conference and there was a whole lot that I didn't understand, other than what I had actually experienced as a queer person.

Where was I?
Oh, yes, the "strangeness".

Walking down the street, in my day to day life, I wear my political identity on my sleeve; which not everyone gets, understandably so, I suppose. Most of the time I feel as though I somehow escape the scrutiny of the hegemony because I don't break any societal conventions in the way I present myself to the world (correct me if I'm wrong IRL people). But I'm aware of where I and the "mainstream" meet and conflict, that place where I know that I don't fit into the categories society assumes to subject me to.

And today, at this conference, it's always amazing to hear the theories that describe the reality in which we live and the people who, along with me, don't fit the *deep breath* Patriarchal-heterosexist-Ashkenazi (i.e. white)-Jewish-nationalistic hegemony.

There is always a problem of representation. There wasn't any panel (that I saw) that touched on Bisexual identity specifically, there wasn't a whole lot about Trans' issues and there was a lot of Judith Butler bashing, which seems to be a trend in current post-structural theory and philosophy - which I don't get, personally.

There was a whole lot of talk on Queer identity, which a lot of times is used as an umbrella term for LGBT, but as (the amazing) Amalia Ziv said this evening, Queer is also an adjective and a verb... but not everyone has an identity which is fluid and shifting and changing.

I consider myself and call myself queer in certain circles, but I know that my some members of my family don't understand what I mean by "queer", but "bisexual" - with the baggage that word carries, is something most people who aren't queer themselves and know queer culture - is easier to understand, because it holds within the binary mainstream society insists we live as either homo or hetero, being bi is a little skew from that, but there is the option of one way or the other - with Queer, the options, the categories, themselves are put into question.

And that's what I felt what the conference was about; mainly about literary texts and more theorizing than practicality... but hey, this is academia, sometimes theory is the praxis.